We know it's important to build and maintain a solid foundation for our marriage or life partnership...
... So how do we do that?
And by 'staying friends' what do I mean? John Gottman, Ph.D. in his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work emphasizes the value of developing a richly detailed "love map" of your partner's inner world. Really knowing your partner, as simple as that sounds, is a key element to staying friends. You know how when you look at Google Maps you can zoom out for a general lay of the land, or zoom in to get more details of the area you are exploring? Gottman says that couples do better (and experience higher levels of relationship satisfaction) when they keep their love maps of each other highly detailed and up to date. That's one important way you can build and continue to fortify the foundation of your marriage or life partnership!
Only when people feel really known do they feel really loved. So if you are intentional about studying up on your spouse or partner, and are good about regularly checking in, your "love map" will be up to date and functional. You will be able to be a better friend, because you will know and continue to get to know - your beloved throughout your life!
4 questions you can ask that will help
update your love map of their world!
Dr. Beth Schmit
Licensed Psychologist &
Gottman 7 Principles Program Educator
P.S. The next 1-day condensed Gottman 7 Principles Program Workshop is happening on Sat. Feb. 8th, 2014 9 am-4 pm. Take advantage of the special early registration rate of $245 for both you and your spouse or partner. Space is limited, so why not register today?